Many well-meaning adults ask even quite young children what they want to be when they ”grow up” and then admonish them to work hard and stay in school so they can attain their ”grown up” or adult self. Adults might think that if children just bring their ”grown up” adult future self to mind, this will remind children to more engaged with their schoolwork. However, children’s adult future self is far away and this does not always work. But why? Following the logic of social cognition (e.g. Bargh, 2016; Higgins, 1998; Strack & Schwarz, 2016), something that is on the mind or ”accessible” will be used in making judgments only if it is experienced as relevant to the task at hand. A social cognition perspective on self-concept predicts that people include as self- relevant accessible information, unless that information appears irrelevant to making these judgments (Oyserman, Elmore, & Smith, 2012; Oyserman, 2015). This implies that an adult future self will influence judgment only if it is on the mind and experienced as relevant for current choice. Relevance is not to be taken for granted, after all, adulthood is in the distal future, a future so far away that it simply may not be relevant to right now. In line with Identity-Based motivation Theory (Oyserman, 2015), we hypothesized that the feeling of connection between the present self and the future self will primed the feeling of relevance. First, we primed a lay theory about the future self (it is near, connected, overlapping with the current self or it is far, disconnected, and separate from the current self) and tested consequences. We show that experienced connection is consequential (Studies 1, N = 116; and Study 2, N = 173, in Nurra & Oyserman, 2018). We do so by showing that students led to experience high connection between current ‘me’ and adult future ‘me’ subsequently have better academic performance (school grades) than students led to experience low connection between current ‘me’ and adult future ‘me.’ We assess short term (Study 1) and long term (Study 2) effects. Second, we questioned directionality of the link. In fact, in everyday life, the direction of effect may be reversed. That is, children who are guided to act in future oriented ways may come to see their adult future selves as near and connected to their current self. Moreover, the process might be iterative and reciprocal rather than unfolding primarily in either direction. That is, considering the future self as connected to one’s current self might activate school engagement and working on school might active the idea that the future is connected. We tested this hypothesis with a longitudinal study with 6 measurements times from the beginning of 10th grade to the end of 11th grade (Study 3, N = 1956). Behavior was measured through actual grade and absenteeism. As predicted, we showed that there is a reciprocal effect between the feeling of connection and actual grade and absenteeism.